What Price Fashion?

That is a very airy view of Ohio State's Ivan Harris going to the hole in what must have been a quite breezy United Center. Actually, Harris is sporting OSU's brand, spakin' new uniforms.

The new duds sport jerseys that are extremely tighter than anything DeShaun Wood is wearing, which I would assume is an advantage over anyone flapping in the wind. Greg Oden even said that when opponents grab these new snugger shirts he'll definitely get more calls. So the new tops are quite the step up.

It's these shorts that I can't get past.

Now, don't think I'm some stick-in-the-mud fuddy duddy rambling on about these here kids today. There is no way these pants offer anything to help your play, they could only potentially hinder it. I'm not thinking the Buckeyes will suffer a spate of their new shorts/ longs/ pantaloons getting snagged on the rim. No, I'm worried about their public persona when they continually show up to basketball games dressed like my wife heading to a wedding reception.

OSU, Florida, Syracuse and Arizona are all wearing gaucho pants. Hell, throw some knee-high leather boots on the Buckeyes and they'll be confused for a Delta Zeta pledge class.

You know them. Your mom already has a pair, and I defy you to sneak into a baby shower and not find a young lass sipping mimosas while enjoying a less than fitting feeling about the thighs. They're ubiquity has now stretched to March Madness.

Supposedly Nike's athletic version of the gaucho allows the addition of padding for banging in the lane or if you're stuck with a gum-popping, handsy head coach.

The gauchos - backed with Phil Knight money, the same guy who brought you this assault on your eyes - are here to stay at least for the Madness before us. Just don't call this haute couture the "wave of the future," because it most certainly is not. Take a look at this school marm turned power forward.Seems like Nike dipped way back to the primordial basketball ooze in search of inspiration to further distract us from the court. Just don't come crying to me when Purdue's Carl Landry asks if you always let your mama dress you.

Who am I kidding? Greg Oden could get 20 & 12 wearing a pair of corduroys and a cape.