Monday, November 06, 2006

Ghetto bastard

At one early point during Satuday's juvenile race at the Breeder's Cup, I'm pretty sure U D Ghetto was trailing by at least half a lap. He had the discipline and work ethic of a communication major, who half-way through the semester has yet to attend back-to-back classes of his required physics course and realizes that trying to keep pace by simply reading each session's powerpoint slides online is leading to certain failure.* Still, the horse was doing some things correctly (like running the right direction!) and fought off his senior-itis with equal parts vim and vigor, making up a huge distance down the backstretch to finish 7th! A lazy start, followed by a dizzying flurry of genius potential realized, culminating in a mediocre but less-than-embarassing showing. This horse is a true Flyer!

But I'm turning my ire to USA Today contributor Scott Finley. This chucklehead had the audacity to refer to America's favorite horse as "horribly named." Scott Finley, you clearly cannot be bothered to research where horse names come from, as a simple google news search of U D Ghetto would provide several stories leading to the inspiration of the name. Regardless of your confusion, it seems that you, Scott Finley, obviously must think that ghettos in general are horrible places - you elitist, racist, snob. Well let me you tell about about someone that I find to be horribly named. Scott Finley. What is that? It makes no earthly sense. Who would name a person that? Only someone who wishes for their child to grow up and become a hateful, ill-informed, vengeful USA Today contriubutor. Jerk.

* This comparison is completely hypothetical and in no way based on a former UD communication major currently writing this entry.


Anonymous said...

Scott Finley is an asshat! Long Live UD Ghetto!

Dirk Calloway said...

Yes! Viva la resistance! We will bury Scott Finley and all those who subscribe to his manifesto of hatred toward awesomely named horses!

Anonymous said...

I'm with you Dirk. Who does Scott Finley think he is. I did however get a great chuckle out of the communications major hypothetical. It is more real than most would believe.