Tuesday, June 05, 2007

Leave the ball, will you George?

Basketball and indie rock. They're not commonly associated with one another, and yet, I always enjoy the few occasions when the worlds intersect. For example, when Elliott Smith died, there was no shortage of heartfelt tributes (occasionally sprinkled with hypocritical "cautionary tale-type" posturing from former junkies in The Flaming Lips.) But among the outpouring of sympathy, my favorite tribute came in the form of Ben Folds relating a tale about Ben, Elliott, and Beck playing basketball. It's a bizarre, but sweetly endearing and personable image to think of Beck posting up for a turnaround j while Elliott throws elbows left and right to box out.

Alas, sometimes the mix of critical acclaim and roundball can lead to theft and/or slander, as the following blog showcases:


The author of the blog alleges that lead singer Win Butler stole his basketball from the Cal Berkley gym. Interestingly enough, Win's brother (and bandmate) Will weighs in on the blog comments and makes a compelling case that Win in fact did NOT commit the alleged theft. Will even created his own blog which not only maintains the band's innocence, but also drops a brilliant Chris Gaines reference.

In reality, it doesn't really matter if the ball was stolen or not. The allegation was made, and that creates buzz whether it's true or not. Based on this, I would like to weigh in with some of my own accusations. Are my allegations true or false? Again, it doesn't matter. I have written it down, therefore transferring the burden of proof onto anyone who would like to prove me wrong.
  • Jeff Tweedy stole my kicking tee.
  • Ben Gibbard stole my shin guards.
  • Lily Allen stole my shuttlecock.
  • Isaac Brock stole my hacky sack.
  • The Hold Steady stole my Kent Hrbek jersey.
If you see any of the following items, please inform your local authorities. I demand satisfaction!

NOTE: A major tip of the hat to Gorilla vs Bear for the fine artwork shown above.

1 comment:

Ross McLochness said...

Makes me think of the time I caught Fugazi red handed trying to steal my 9-iron.

Straight edge bastards.